Tuesday, 22 November 2011

A day of 2 halves

AM Update: I'm fed up. 
For 3 weeks now Baby M has basically been feeding, regurgitating her food, sleeping or crying for more food. Actually that's not fair: she has brief happy moments, but I spend so much of my time with her attached to a boob that it's easy to forget. We've really struggled with breastfeeding and I'm really proud we've managed to stick with it exclusively for 8 weeks, but now we are having problems again.  My nipples have finally just about healed from the initial problems, but now she isn't feeding properly from the right side. When she latches on it hurts and I suspect my nipple is cracking again. I refuse to give her formula, but I'm really struggling. 

In addition the last few days she keeps falling asleep whilst feeding then waking up soon afterwards demanding more food. This is a huge struggle at night. Last night I had to feed her in the position she would sleep in and eventually she would be full enough to sleep (this involved some very interesting positioning).
She's feeding really inefficiently so even after 45 minutes on one side my boob isn't empty. 

I also have hardly anything to wear as I need to be able to have easy access to my boobs and everything gets covered in vomit within 5 mins.
I love Baby M, even when she is screaming her lungs out, but I wish I was more on top of things.

PM Update:

This morning I went to the Health Visitor drop in to get out the house and to get some advice.  She said she wasn't worried about Baby M because she is gaining weight, but that she was worried about me. She suggested I go to a breastfeeding drop in to check the latch is ok.
On the way back Baby M fell asleep and stayed asleep for 2 hours (if only I was able to sleep too). In the end I got her up as it had been 3 1/2 hours since her last feed and recently she has been going 2 hours maximum in the day between feeds. 
After feeding her (she was on and off for an hour and a quarter) she was sick 4 times. Her top was completely covered in regurgitated milk (I've learnt there's no point changing her each time as she'll just be sick again). She was happy for an hour and a half then she started crying again so I tried to feed her, but she wouldn't latch on. Eventually after 3 and a half hours she fed again. 

So... this morning I was complaining that she was feeding too often and this afternoon I was worried because she didn't want to feed and how often she'll wake up tonight if she doesn't get enough food during the day. 

I guess as long as I'm a mum I will be worried about my beautiful daughter. 

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